It has been a while since my last twin post. In lieu of Mother’s Day, I thought I would share how my life has changed since being a mama of twins.
Prior to my pregnancy I was a planner and researcher. I spent so much time analyzing the best way to do things. Then I set to getting them done; in a perfectly productive manner (much to my “go with the flow” husband’s annoyance). I always had a plan in place; and had to follow that plan to the letter. Spontaneous to me would be letting my husband choose a restaurant….from a carefully chosen list.
Then this happened:
Since I had an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy months earlier, an emergency ultrasound was ordered. We had our first photography session at eight weeks:
Needless to say, we were a bit surprised.
I had an awesome pregnancy. So awesome that if I could guarantee every pregnancy would be as good as this one, I might do it over. *Maybe we’ll talk twin pregnancy in the future.
Back to mothering twins. It seemed that the moment I found out about Thing 1 and Thing 2 (we didn’t find out the sex, so these were the names of our growing fetuses) I let out a huge breath of air. It was as though God was reminding me that he is in charge, so stop planning.
Like most pregnant women, I was not myself. I was more relaxed, nicer, more understanding. I went with the flow (it may have been that I was just too big to fight the current).
Then after forty weeks (actually 39 weeks, and four days), these little buggers decided it was time to make their appearance. The day before their scheduled arrival (cesarean).
After a few short days, the hospital decided it was time for us to go home.
That is when my whole world turned upside down!
Before I go any further I want to say this first; I love being the mama to these wonderful boys. I feel so blessed each and every day, and I would not change a single thing.
Back to the upside-down-world… I had visions about what kind of mom I would be. I had concrete determination about how we were going to parent these little blessings. But God had other plans.
Motherhood is nothing like I had imagined it. In the beginning it was almost unbearable. Of course, I looked put-together. It seemed like I was adjusting. I appeared to be handling this new role. But I was an absolute mess!
Things didn’t get easier until I gave up. I didn’t give up on the family, I gave up trying to force my plans. Once I threw in the towel, and started ‘going with the flow’ things sort of fell into place.
It is still so very hard for me to adjust to each new obstacle mothering brings, but I finally feel like I can handle change. We are well into the toddler stage, and EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. presents something new and albeit challenging, but now I just cope.
I can comfortably tell people that motherhood is the most awesome and rewarding thing I have ever done.
There will be steep hills you have to battle to climb. But please don’t keep your focus at reaching the top. Instead, soak in each and every experience on the way.